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geceler neyimize yetmiyor ki?

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elimden tut…

yoksa düşeceğim

***

yine yine yine ben,

dönüp dolaşıp geldiğim yerde,

karşındayım..

sen nerelerdesin peki?

nerelere daldın yine?

gözlerini yakalayabilmek için çabalamak, elimden gelen tek şey.

başarısızlığa alıştım ama ben.

vazgeçmeye,

boşvermeye,

yalnızları oynamaya

alıştım işte ben.

umut,

yok.

*

ikilem demiştim bi yerlerde.

ikilem filan değilmiş bahsettiğimiz.

bi olan bi de olması gereken varmış.

ama olması gereken hiç bi zaman olmazmış.

masallar hiç bi’ zaman gerçek olmazmış.

insanlar geceleri masallarda.

gündüzleri öykülerde yaşarlarmış.

bundandır geceleri uzatmalarım.

bundandır gün ağardığında gözümü kapamalarım.

*

karanlığın en zifiri olduğu anda

git,

gideceksen.

gündüz gidenleri farkedemedim hiç.

gece olduğunda tekrar, hayaletlerini aldım yanıma ve yaşadım.

gecenin dibinde, karanlığın en zifirisindeyim,

git.

***

eğer şairsem,

beni tanırsan,

yağmurdan korktuğumu bilirsen,

gözlerim aklına gelirse,

elimden tut, yoksa düşeceğim.

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