rss search

gözlerimi kapattığıma bakmayın, orada olduğunuzu biliyorum

line

2010’dan bu yana yazdım bir şeyler. (öncesi de var gerçi ama şimdi 2010’a kadar gidebildim kendimce.)

yazdığım her yazıda karşımda biri-birileri- vardı.
karşımda kimse kalmadığından değil uzun zamandır yazmamam-yazamamam-
gözlerimi kapattım sadece.

ama gözelerimi kapattığıma bakmayın, orada olduğunuzu biliyorum.

*

sen mesela,

“ne çok benzer yönümüz var değil mi?”
hatırla mesela, “karanlıkta nüfus sayımı şöyle yapılır, yaşayanlar bir sigara yakar.” dediğimde sigaranı yakmak üzere olduğun zamanı hatırla.
*

sen,
en büyük kazancım, en derin kaybım.
“eğleniyorsak sorun yok” dediğimde uğradığın hayal kırıklığını hatırla.
çok hayal kırmadım ben(*) bundan belki de o anı unutamayışım.

*

sen,
en umutsuz olduğum anda elini uzatıp beni yukarı çeken sen.
ne çok şey öğrendim senden.
öğrendiğimde çok geç olmuştu belki ama “iyi ki”lerin başını çeken sen.

*

sen,
okumazsın, görmezsin bu yazıyı sen.
yine de Sen’siz olmaz bu yazı dediğim sen.

*

ve sen,
suskunluğumun sebebi sen.
suskunluğumun utancıma sebep olmasına sebep sen.
kırdığım en büyük hayal, sen.

*

karşımdasınız hepiniz, suskunluklarınız birbirine karışıyor.
sırayla susun,
anlamıyorum.

*

(yazının rezilliğin daniskası olduğunu ben de biliyorum.-edebi anlamda değil. anlarsınız ya.- ama görün işte gerçek ben’i.)

*

ben iyi bi’ adam olamadım.

27.464 comments

line
  1. PingpeK

    darknet drug links url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink dark web market links /url

    line
  2. darkmarket url url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlistv8tg0/darknetmarketlist darknet market lists /url

    line
  3. dark web market links url=https://github.com/tormarkets2025ukaz1/tormarkets2025 dark market url /url

    line
  4. dark market 2025 url=https://github.com/nexusdarkneturlwrf4t/nexusdarkneturl darknet websites /url

    line
  5. darkmarket 2025 url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlinks2025/darknetmarkets darkmarket url /url

    line
  6. darknet links url=https://github.com/tormarkets2025ukaz1/tormarkets2025 darkmarket 2025 /url

    line
  7. darkmarkets url=https://github.com/nexusdarkneturlwrf4t/nexusdarkneturl darknet market lists /url

    line
  8. dark market link url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlistv8tg0/darknetmarketlist darknet site /url

    line
  9. darknet websites url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlinks2025/darknetmarkets dark markets /url

    line
  10. dark web market links url=https://github.com/nexusdarkneturlwrf4t/nexusdarkneturl dark web marketplaces /url

    line
  11. PingpeK

    onion dark website url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink dark websites /url

    line
  12. PingpeK

    darknet market lists url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink dark web market /url

    line
  13. dark web market links url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlistv8tg0/darknetmarketlist dark web market urls /url

    line
  14. PingpeK

    dark web sites url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink dark market link /url

    line
  15. dark web markets url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlistv8tg0/darknetmarketlist bitcoin dark web /url

    line
  16. darknet websites url=https://github.com/tormarkets2025ukaz1/tormarkets2025 darknet market lists /url

    line
  17. onion dark website url=https://github.com/nexusdarkneturlwrf4t/nexusdarkneturl dark web markets /url

    line
  18. darknet market list url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlinks2025/darknetmarkets dark markets 2025 /url

    line
  19. dark web marketplaces url=https://github.com/tormarkets2025ukaz1/tormarkets2025 darknet markets /url

    line
  20. PingpeK

    dark web marketplaces url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink dark market /url

    line
  21. dark market url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlinks2025/darknetmarkets darknet market /url

    line
  22. PingpeK

    darknet market list url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink tor drug market /url

    line
  23. dark websites url=https://github.com/tormarkets2025ukaz1/tormarkets2025 darknet markets url /url

    line
  24. dark market onion url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlinks2025/darknetmarkets dark market 2025 /url

    line
  25. dark markets url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlistv8tg0/darknetmarketlist darkmarket /url

    line
  26. darknet drug market url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlistv8tg0/darknetmarketlist darkmarket url /url

    line
  27. dark web market list url=https://github.com/tormarkets2025ukaz1/tormarkets2025 dark market 2025 /url

    line
  28. dark web link url=https://github.com/nexusdarkneturlwrf4t/nexusdarkneturl tor drug market /url

    line
  29. darknet markets links url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlinks2025/darknetmarkets dark web market urls /url

    line
  30. PingpeK

    darkmarket url url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink darkmarket url /url

    line
  31. dark markets 2025 url=https://github.com/tormarkets2025ukaz1/tormarkets2025 darknet markets links /url

    line
  32. bitcoin dark web url=https://github.com/nexusdarkneturlwrf4t/nexusdarkneturl dark market link /url

    line
  33. Click

    You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this matter to be actually something that I think I would never understand. It seems too complicated and extremely broad for me. I’m looking forward for your next post I will try to get the hang of it Here is that site. Thanx

    line
  34. darkmarket link url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlistv8tg0/darknetmarketlist darknet websites /url

    line
  35. PingpeK

    dark web market list url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink dark web markets /url

    line
  36. darknet markets url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlinks2025/darknetmarkets darknet drug store /url

    line
  37. PingpeK

    onion dark website url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink dark market /url

    line
  38. tor drug market url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlistv8tg0/darknetmarketlist bitcoin dark web /url

    line
  39. PingpeK

    dark market 2025 url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink dark web sites /url

    line
  40. Клининг в Москве от лидеров рынка: 12 лет опыта 500 проверенных клинеров и рейтинг 49/5 на ЯндексКартах клининг компания москва kliningovye-kompanii-0.ru .

    line
  41. darkmarket url url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlistv8tg0/darknetmarketlist darknet drug links /url

    line
  42. dark market list url=https://github.com/nexusdarkneturlwrf4t/nexusdarkneturl darknet drug links /url

    line
  43. PingpeK

    darkmarket url url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink dark web markets /url

    line
  44. darknet drugs url=https://github.com/tormarkets2025ukaz1/tormarkets2025 dark markets 2025 /url

    line
  45. darknet markets url=https://github.com/nexusdarkneturlwrf4t/nexusdarkneturl onion dark website /url

    line
  46. tor drug market url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlinks2025/darknetmarkets darknet websites /url

    line
  47. best darknet markets url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlinks2025/darknetmarkets dark market onion /url

    line
  48. dark markets url=https://github.com/tormarkets2025ukaz1/tormarkets2025 darknet drug store /url

    line
  49. dark markets 2025 url=https://github.com/darknetmarketlinks2025/darknetmarkets dark web sites /url

    line
  50. PingpeK

    dark web drug marketplace url=https://github.com/aresmarketlink0ru72/aresmarketlink dark web market list /url

    line

Leave a Reply